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“If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family anatidae on our hands.”

Douglas Adams quotes (British comic Writer, 1952-2001)

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“Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.”

Douglas Adams quotes (British comic Writer, 1952-2001)

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“The knack of flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.”

Douglas Adams quotes (British comic Writer, 1952-2001)

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“What to do if you find yourself stuck in a crack in the ground underneath a giant boulder you can't move, with no hope of rescue. Consider how lucky you are that life has been good to you so far. Alternatively, if life hasn't been good to you so far, which given your current circumstances seems more likely, consider how lucky you are that it won't be troubling you much longer.”

Douglas Adams quotes (British comic Writer, 1952-2001)

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“It is known that there are an infinte number of worlds, simply because there is an infinite amount of space for them to be in. However, not every one of them is inhabited. Any finite number divided by infinity is as near nothing as makes no odds, so the average population of all the planets in the Universe can be said to be zero. From this it follows that the population of the whole Universe is also zero, and that any people you may meet from time to time are merely products of a deranged imagination.”

Douglas Adams quotes (British comic Writer, 1952-2001)

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“It's no coincidence that in no known language does the phrase "As pretty as an airport" appear”

Douglas Adams quotes (British comic Writer, 1952-2001)

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“The mere thought hadn't even begun to speculate about the merest possibility of crossing my mind.”

Douglas Adams quotes (British comic Writer, 1952-2001)

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“'This must be Thursday. I never could get the hang of Thursdays.'”

Douglas Adams quotes (British comic Writer, 1952-2001)

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“'My doctor says that I have a malformed public duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fibre,' he muttered to himself, 'and that I am therefore excused from saving Universes.'”

Douglas Adams quotes (British comic Writer, 1952-2001)

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“He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it.”

Douglas Adams quotes (British comic Writer, 1952-2001)

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“Now it is such a bizarrely improbable coincidence that anything so mind-bog-gglingly useful could have evolved purely by chance that some thinkers have chosen to see it as the final and clinching proof of the non-existence of God.
The argument goes something like this: `I refuse to prove that I exist,' says God, `for proof denies faith, and without faith I am nothing.'
`But,' says Man, `The Babel fish is a dead giveaway, isn't it? It could not have evolved by chance. It proves you exist, and so therefore, by your own arguments, you don't. QED.'
`Oh dear,' says God, `I hadn't thought of that,' and promptly vanished in a puff of logic.
`Oh, that was easy,' says Man, and for an encore goes on to prove that black is white and gets
himself killed on the next zebra crossing.”

enigmaticfaerie

Douglas Adams quotes (British comic Writer, 1952-2001)

Similar Quotes. About: Humor quotes.

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